Which is better? Future or Past?

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I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past. – Thomas Jefferson (April 13, 1743 – July 4, 1826, 3rd US President)

We all have a past, some of it is good and some of it is bad. Some of us can’t get past the bad to remember the good. That has so many people stuck in the same rut as they’ve always been in. These people want to be better, do better, and have more but they just keep on doing what they’ve always done. Because that is what they are comfortable with.

In episode 3 I talked about getting out of your comfort zone to grow and experience new things. We all have dreams of a better future, but some of us don’t know how to get over the past. There is still hope, if you want it.

I don’t know about you, but I have always been a dreamer. I have come up with some great ideas, I’ve even tried a few. But, it seems like I am always right there but have never been able to crossover and “make it”. I don’t know if it’s something from my past that I haven’t dealt with, or exactly what it is.

I’ve started many things and either I will get sidetracked by something else or I’ll get cold feet and tell myself that no one will want what I have to offer. I would like you to try something, it might be hard but in order to move forward we have to go backward for a minute.

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Whenever you can find a quiet minute, sit back and think, what is holding you back from achieving what you desire? For some it’s easy to figure out… other’s it’s harder. I’m in the other group, somethings are hard for me to figure out.

I was spending some time with my buddy John and we were talking and he’s like me. We are great listeners and can help someone else with what they are going through, but to do it ourselves it’s a little harder. I am starting to overcome it and apply what I tell others to my life and things are going better.

Since I have been doing this, I’ve noticed that I’m a lot calmer and welcome the chance to talk and meet with people. Just today I was talking to some one who came into the shop to buy tires and I had the courage to tell him that I was making this podcast.

Now I don’t think he knew what a podcast was, but that’s not the point. Before, I would have been scared to say anything for fear that I would be laughed at or ridiculed. You see, it’s the little steps we take to get us farther than we have ever gone before. Whatever you call it, you have to take that first step and then another one, then another one. Before you know it, shoot your half way there.

Some of the time that is where I really get scared, is when I am halfway. I started this business in 2009, selling gelatin air freshener’s that I made at a large flea market. Now this flea market had 12-13,000 people a day come through on the weekend. What was the slap in the face was that I didn’t sell but about 4 air fresheners out of the 2,000 I made. I tried for a solid month. Shoot I even added trinkets, now those sold pretty decently. But it wasn’t enough to make up what I had spent. I desperately wanted to keep going, but I couldn’t justify the ROI. So, I closed up shop and paid back what I borrowed and went back to work. I took a little break from stepping out again.

I went back to a regular job, where I knew it was safe. I was putting myself down because I was back in my comfort zone. Since that time, I’ve dabbled in a couple of other ideas but nothing on the scale that I attempted in 2009. In fact this podcast is the start of one of my dreams for me. My other dream is to become a successful photographer. I still have my job, for now because I still have bills to pay.

I know though, if I keep going I will succeed in my dreams. When I turned 50, I took a couple of days and reflected on the 50 years I have been alive. I realized that just about every dream that I had came true. Talk about a WOW moment, that really set me back in awe that I had actually achieved what I set out to do.

What really got me to wondering though, what was I going to do now? I really didn’t know. Well, I still had this idea to start a podcast, and I did have my photography, but that was it. It was scary for me because I’ve always had multiple dreams.

So, I just kept working and taking life one day at a time. I feel like I have another 50 years ahead of me and I want to make it better than my first 50. So here we are 6 months after my 50th birthday and I am going to start this podcast doing something that I have always wanted to do. Help you become better today than you were yesterday. Just like I am doing with myself.

If you truly want to have a happier life, you need to change. That might mean leaving some friends (family) behind. If the people in your life don’t make you a better person, then you need to find better people. I won’t lie to you, that is going to be hard. It’s hard for me and something I’m still working on myself. So, don’t feel alone in this, you are not alone.

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What I can say is, when you start to find the right people to help you and not hurt you, you will not only be happier, life will start to get easier. It seems I am someone people like to have a laugh at my expense. It starts out fun and games at first, but as time goes on it bothers me. When I was in my 20’s I was just like they were, except meaner about it. I made fun of anyone who didn’t think like I did and at that time I didn’t care what anyone thought. I had a lot of growing up to do.

It took me a while to do it, but now instead of tearing someone down because I don’t believe what they do. I try to understand their way of thinking and see if I can find some common ground. It doesn’t always work, but I don’t shoot them down for it, I try to lift them up. If I’m not able to lift the person up, I pray that the seeds I have planted will one day take root.

I hope you found this helpful in some way or another and if you have then by all means please share this podcast with someone so they can maybe benefit from it. I look forward until the next time, when we can get together and learn something new. Until then, smile and know that you can achieve what you believe. Have a blessed day.

When Do You Plan To Start?

You know how everyone on Social Media talks about and having resolutions/goals to help you make it in the New Year. Why is that a big thing? Why can’t you start your new year today!

“Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one.” -Brad Paisley (country singer)

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I, like so many of you fell into the trap of making resolutions/goals every year and I planned on starting it on January 1st. Usually, by the second or third week of the month I gave up and went back to the same thing I did before. That is what many of us still do today.

I still see many of you getting on the bandwagon and have the best of intentions, then life gets in the way and we revert back to our old comfortable ways. The only way to grow is to get out of our comfort zone and push through the negative thoughts in our head.

We have trained our brains to what we think is comfortable and we enjoy it. The only way to grow in life is to break those chains and do things we have never done before. Or to do something we are terrified to do. That is the only way we are going to grow.

I have friends/family (and I am guilty of this myself) that stay in the same old rut and let everything and everyone get us down. All that is doing, is keeping us where we always have been.

If you truly want something different in life, then you have to get out of your head and take that first step. In this area I am no different than you, except that I am now doing this podcast. I have been preparing this for 4 years now. I have content coming out of my ears and getting more and more everyday.

Why, haven’t I started until now you ask? I’ll be honest with you… I was scared to get out of my comfort zone. I have done many other things in my life that weren’t in my comfort zone and it was amazing. I have been on an Internet radio show, I have been on a TV morning show, and a few other things that escape me at the moment.

So you might wonder why I am scared to do this? That is a great question. Maybe, it’s because I think people will laugh at me. Is one thing that comes to mind. Maybe, it’s partly the fear of failure. The reason I say that is because I have tried to start a couple of businesses in the past and have failed miserably.

I have tried network marketing and haven’t had much luck there either. I have tried selling things and have failed at that. I have been divorced twice…see why I am a little hesitant?

Have I stopped trying? No. I haven’t, I have just taken a long pause to try and figure out what would work for me. During this time I have come to realize that even though I might get laughed at, slammed, or put down (for whatever reason). I am going to keep going. Because this is what I like to do. Help people become a better version of themselves than they were the day before.

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I have learned how to be happy in the face of getting yelled at for whatever the reason. I have had things thrown at me and instead of flipping out and acting like a crazy man. I sit down, and instead of dwelling on the problem, I look for a solution. When I find a path that will work, I also have a plan B. I don’t dwell on what people say that I HAVE to do. I dwell on what I AM going to do and put my plan into motion.

Something else I have come to realize is that people/businesses will try to say anything to get you to do what they want. That is where I figure what they can and can’t do at that particular time and fashion my plans around that. I want to get whatever it is and get the problem took care of, but sometimes, what they want won’t work for me.

Instead of fighting with them, I will present my plan and be flexible (to a point). I do this with everything that gets thrown at me and have come to the realization that a lot of the time. We can come to an amicable agreement.

In doing this I have more and better peace than I have ever dreamed of. I am not scared and worried what people will think of me, I live life on my terms. I am still working in this area, and that is my past. I have put a lot of it behind me because it wasn’t that great and I don’t let it define who I am.

I have taken what I have needed from that era. Figured out where I went wrong, and have adjusted me so I can be a better person. I still have people (in my life) who live in the past and won’t see 6 inches past their nose to see what I have become. I am fine with that, because there ship still hasn’t sailed and it probably never will.

What I am saying here is if you have people in your life holding you back, for whatever reason learn to move on and be the person that you want to see. If you don’t know who that person is, take some time and figure it out. You will be a lot happier for it.

Photo by Markos Mant on Unsplash

So, as this is a new year, try to break out of your comfort zone and do something that you have never done before or something that you’ve always wanted to do. You haven’t missed the boat, because you haven’t sailed it yet, it’s still in the dock. Shove off and set your sail for something that you have always wanted to do.

As you begin on this journey, take notes, write down what you are experiencing. Then each day, week, or month go back and review what has worked and what hasn’t, and adjust from there. You will be surprised how far you have traveled in such a short time. Once you realize that your out to sea, then there’s no sense in turning back and losing all of the progress you have made. Sail on, keep going, your in control of what you want to accomplish. The world is what you want it to be. Not what someone tells you it has to be.

I truly want to see everyone, make something of themselves, be happy with themselves, and DO NOT apologize for what you want to do. Have fun, be kind, and smile, life will definitely smile back.